In response to the purely idiosyncratic article The Straits Times published on emo kids ("Parents, beware the emo kids" - ST, March 19), I decided to say my piece.
Warning: It's pretty lousy, because I am currently sick. Thank you.
I refer to the article, "Parents, beware of emo kids" (ST, March 19), in which so called 'emo kids' deliberately harm themselves just so that they can fit in and look cool.
I am seventeen this year and I hope to say my piece on this issue, because I have been (and still am) called 'emo'.
Why so?
Well, I have what they call an 'emo fringe', I love my black band tees and my eyeliner...and most of all, I listen to 'emo music'. I do not blame people who judge me, but I sincerely hope that this stereotype would not be warped any further, because I am very sure that many other teens like me who listen to 'emo music' and who dress 'emo' do not self mutilate like some others do.
But firstly, I think everyone should get the true meaning of the term correct. The term 'emo' actually refers to a sub-genre of rock music, not some label that teenagers these days associate it with.
Now, it sounds oh so ironic that I am saying all this when I myself dress 'emo', but the point is, I only dress this way because I feel that it is the best way to express who I really am, not because I am desperately trying to be an 'emo kid'.
Next, I completely agree with Miss Taina Teravainen ("Teens Distort Meaning of Emo", Sunday Times, March 25), that emo bands such as My Chemical Romance have been grossly misunderstood.
Personally, I am a huge fan of My Chemical Romance and they were, in fact, the ones that made my angsty teenage self so much less conflicted. They have made me a stronger, more confident person and have cheered me up whenever I was down.
The band also constantly pleads fans to not self mutilate and gives out very positive messages to respect others, a polar opposite on what some 'emo kids' interpret their songs to be. I feel that 'emo kids' take the lyrics too literally.
Lastly, I am a firm believer that 9 out of 10 of these self proclaimed 'emos' have strong, stable family backgrounds and really have nothing to complain about. Of course, I would sound like a total hypocrite if I said that I had not wallowed in self pity just for the sake of doing so, but thankfully, I managed to clear my head just in time to prevent myself from doing anything stupid.
Fitting in is the main focus during the teenage years, so I do not criticise any of these 'emos' for doing all this. I mean, who does not want to feel like they belong somewhere? But I hope that they can finally see the light and realise that self mutilation or self pity does not bring themselves anywhere and would only make their teen years ones of retardation, and not progression into finding out who they really are deep inside.
Yep. That's what I sent into the forum.
Told you it was awful.
I'm off now.
BTW Ash, ILYours more :]
These few weeks I've been feeling happy. Feeling all optimistic and 'ain't no stopping me now'.
Not like that's a bad thing. I mean, it really did help me to feel better and everything.
But I stopped thinking.
I had an 'emo' (retarded term, but whatever) relapse yesterday when I was online.
It hit me like an oncoming train.
I feel like such a douchebag for getting 'emo' cuz there really isn't much to wallow in self pity about, but my old mindset flooded my mind again. Plus, my throbbing headache didn't help much.
When I went offline, I went to take a panadol for my head.
Then I had all those morbid desires coming back again.
I used to (and sometimes still do) have a sadistic edge.
It's pretty scary, really. I think I've got some split personality disorder or something. Eeeep.
I've wanted to take anti depressants (I once asked my mom if I should prescribe them). I've wanted to get so drunk that I forget everything. I've wanted to cut myself. I've wanted to do everything other douches like me think of doing.
The reason why I went sXe was also because I have what I call M.A.D. (Morbidly Addictive Disorder). You see, when I get hooked on something, I just can't get off it. And most of the time, these things I get hooked on are self destructive. Yeah, this is me.
Thankfully for me, I've never done anything much to harm myself. I've never cut myself, gotten high on drugs or alcohol. I really thank God and MCR for that. If it weren't for both, I'd probably be a total wreck.
If you're wondering what's up with all this 'self pitying narcissism', I think it's the influence of MCR (particularly The Black Parade) on me.
Gerard mentioned that for writing the album, he had to dig up all his insides (not literally) and place them on an operating table.
I do that all the time and I can really find out how ugly (again, not literally) some parts of me are.
All my evil thoughts, unfair judgements, etc.
Some people see it as 'not embracing who you are', but if you don't criticise yourself and try to correct all your bad points, what's there to embrace?
With that, I shall end this post.
Oh, if you've got the time, go catch MCR's new video.
It's EPIC.
MWAH!
I know that I very well should be blogging and posting up pictures of the FOB gig on Saturday, but I've not got all the pictures from Joe/Aaron/Bibbles/whoever so...be patient.
Anyway, these few weeks have been...odd. Yeah, well. My mind's been open to more things that I've not been really exposed to before.
Without going into any details or naming names, I just decided to put some song lyrics up. MCR, of course. (I just LOVE how MCR seems to have a song to fit every mood I'm in.)
This REALLY, REALLY represents what I'm feeling now.
So...erm...happy guessing!
I Don't Love You - My Chemical Romance
Well, when you go
Don't ever think I'll make you try to stay
And maybe when you get back
I'll be off to find another way
Don't ever think I'll make you try to stay
And maybe when you get back
I'll be off to find another way
And after all this time that you still owe
You're still the good-for-nothing I don't know
So take your gloves and get out
Better get out
While you can
When you go
Would you even turn to say
"I don't love you
Like I did
Yesterday"
Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading
So sick and tired of all the needless beating
But baby when they knock you
Down and out
It's where you oughta stay
And after all the blood that you still owe
Another dollar's just another blow
So fix your eyes and get up
Better get up
While you can
Whoa, whooa
When you go
Would you even turn to say
"I don't love you
Like I did
Yesterday"
Well come on, come on
When you go
Would you have the guts to say
"I don't love you
Like I loved you
Yesterday"
I don't love you
Like I loved you
Yesterday
I don't love you
Like I loved you
Yesterday
AMEN.